This, too, shall pass - encouragement from friends

This is a follow-on from my previous posts,
Goodbye Prostate. Goodbye Old Friend - Apr 7
The Picture of Health (Almost) - Apr 25



I have a few friends who have had prostate surgery of one form or another whom I emailed for a metaphorical shoulder to cry on. Here are their responses.

Firstly, from a friend who does not have prostate cancer but another prostate condition known as benign prostatic hyperplasia (BPH) - the chief symptom being inability to urinate.

Welcome to the club. I have been lucky as I go for a checkup once a year. I have had two TURPS, kind of reaming out the prostate like coring an apple. So far, so good.
(For TURP see Transurethral resection of the prostate.)

Then this rather sanguine response from another good friend who was, indeed, diagnosed with prostate cancer:

I'll keep you in my prayers indeed. All will go well.  There is no need to cry.  It is like losing the appendix.

Like losing the appendix? WAS I MISSING SOMETHING? Then I received this more sobering, and lengthy missive (at least by today's email standards) from another good, old friend:

Well, I suppose that's sort of good news - at least it's caught in time (mine was diagnosed just before the heart surgery, so it was first things first, but I think it was also probably a bit far down the track by then even).  Maybe you will be spared some of the stuff I have had - like the erectile function which just never came back, and the incontinence which is sort of OK but when I get tired (or have a beer or glass of wine) then it's on with the pads.


My brother in law (who is about 7 years older than I am) had a prostatectomy about a year ago and everything went fine - he had a post-op catheter for about 2 days(!) and no incontinence, etc.  I don't know how that works.


I don't know if this is a nice thing to do, but someone I know did it for me and at least I wasn't caught unawares - i.e. warn you about some of the things that go on.  I was spoiled by the heart surgery - when you have that everyone treats you like someone special (I mean the hospital staff do).  The prostate was something else - you're just a normal surgery patient.  I have to remind myself that it took a long time to recover from the heart stuff, but the post-op prostate things were definitely more uncomfortable.  The catheter for two weeks was not nice.  Make sure they really do give you a big enough bag - the hospital gave me about a 200ml bag and it was after a few hours after discharge that I realised it wasn't going to last me a night and then the friend (above) went off and got me a 2 litre bag from the pharmacy - and a metal stand thing so that it hangs at the right orientation at night and for walking around with.  Very useful.


The Kegel exercises are a must.  It's weird how this thing that you've done automatically all your life suddenly has to become a willed thing.  For me the first week or so after the catheter came out were not enjoyable.  I seemed to have absolutely no control and it felt like I was never going to come right.  But then I started counting how long it took to empty my bladder when I went to the loo - because the longer it took meant the more I was able to retain.  When I got to about 17-18 seconds regularly I knew I was on the mend.


Anyway, in the end it seems to come right, so none of the above is intended to discourage you.  Remember the wise words from some unknown wise person: "This too shall pass".

This, too, shall pass? Is he talking about the urethra or the catheter or the side effects?

Thank you, my good friends, for being there. It's nice to know I'm not the first and I'm not alone.

This, too, shall pass...